By Tanisha Brown

There’s nothing wrong with being in a dark place so long as you channel that experience into a lesson that leads. We’ll show you how!

Take a look at your life and make notes of what you’ve accomplished. Look at the accolades, gaze at the trophies, and feel the paper diplomas and awards recognizing your achievements. Now think about what it took to get them. Think of the pain, think of the agony, and recall those endless nights spent crying and the fits of self-doubt.

Do you remember the times you were about to give up? The times you were afraid to make that next move?

Success and self-improvement are sold to us as the end game to a successful series of repetitive actions, but what drives us to take those actions? What is it that makes us endure prolonged periods of stress and pain to overcome? It’s simple. It’s fear.

This is a topic I’ve debated with friends and family, and in the end, I believe we are driven by fear and the dark side of our nature. And no, I am not a sadistic human being; I am a strong-willed, strong-minded, and successful woman – but I wasn’t always that way.

Here is how I channeled my Darkside and my dark times into revealing my best light:


My early days of entrepreneurship were harsh. I was taken advantage of, made the wrong decisions, and trusted the advice of friends and family rather than professionals who worked in my industry. Rather than dwell on the mistakes made, I made it a point to understand that these were merely lessons to better further my next venture.

Look, it’s easy to beat yourself up. It’s easy to compare yourself to others. Just remember that life’s too short to be bitter. Be better. Learn to let go.


I used to worry about what my friends thought – especially my family. I valued their feedback, was concerned about what they thought about me. It wasn’t till five years after my father passed that I realized his thoughts about me no longer mattered. I was on this earth void of his pressure, and instead of dwelling on lost time, I realized that this became a lesson. It wasn’t just a lesson to myself; it became one that I was empowered to share with other women. A pricey lesson, to say the least, but one I share with you in hopes you can share your healing, health, and prosperity with your loved ones while they’re still alive.  This is your life. Live it.


Suppose you have high levels of resentment. Open the doors and see just how dark they are. See how far those shadows extend beyond yourself and embrace them. Too many women run away from them and lose themselves in extracurricular activity, but you need to embrace them and use them to your advantage if you want to defeat them.

Here’s an example. 10 years ago, was a ticking time bomb. I was destructive and dark from repressed feelings of always trying to fit in. Rather than deny it, I chose to channel that darkness and flip it to become who I am today. I realized that I had the power to flip the script and channel that same energy to create rather than destroy, love instead of hate.

In closing, understand one thing. It will NOT be easy. Channeling your Darkside to improve yourself takes work. It takes dedication. It takes practice. It takes heartache. Just remember that what matters is most is the end result. So, while you may lose a few battles, in the end, you will win the war and you will do so with empowerment and love.

Stay focused. Stay fierce.